Marriage: God First, Spouse Second, Children Third

marriage

Birgit J

Birgit Jones is a ‘slightly 60,’ passionately pro-life, cradle Catholic. She and her Catholic convert husband, Rick, have been married for 40+ years. Frequent visits from their four adult children and 9 living grandchildren eliminate any fear of an empty nest. Birgit can also be found on Catholic Stand and her Facebook fan page Designs by Birgit.

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6 Responses

  1. Prya Menigan says:

    It’s so funny because I know a woman with small children that believes this completely and spends about 7 hours a day in prayer while her kids wear dirty clothes and take ketchup sandwiches to school. Sometimes she isn’t even sure when the kids leave for school or when they come home because she doesn’t allow herself to be interrupted in her prayer time. The people who create these doctrines don’t even have children, they don’t realize how much they need a mom who is present and interested in them. Kids can’t live on mommy’s leftover time after God and her husband. Mothers are the most important influence in a child’s life and if she doesn’t show up to be the parent, who will? God can fix his own lunch, your kids need their mother. Total devotion to God will wait until your kids are grown and gone. Until then, limit prayer to times when they are asleep or at school.

    • Prya Menigan says:

      In other words, a mother’s primary ministry is to be the mommy to her children.

    • Birgit J says:

      That sounds like an unhealthy situation and yes, I agree that a mother’s primary objective should be the care of her children. Putting God first actually means caring for your children and putting them as well as your spouse first.

  2. This can’t really be a fixed and Biblical order. John the Baptist and Jesus came to “Turn the hearts of the fathers to their children and the hearts of their children to their fathers.” That surely means that putting God first sometimes means putting the children first. If God wants that from the man at a given time, then the family should put the kids first. The order of God isn’t God, then spouse, then children. It’s God in Christ, Christ over man, man the head of the woman, and women over children.

    • Erika says:

      The author already said something to that same effect.

      “Naturally, the physical needs of children (whether infant or disabled) must be dealt with on a practical, earthly priority scale.”

      There are also some times that the ‘authority’ (which is your later list) isn’t exactly that either.

      None of these lists/orders is written in stone. The key is to do things with this order in mind—God, spouse, children. If you put God first, then, when you are following your vocation and caring for your spouse or children, you *are* putting God first. Like St Theresa of the Little Ways says you serve God best by doing little things the way your supposed to…

  1. June 7, 2019

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